In good news for monkeys and gorillas, who are tired of claims that they are in any way related to humans, the Tennessee legislature passed a law yesterday that allows teachers to question the validity of controversial theories like biological evolution, global warming, the chemical origins of life and human cloning: Slate. Even as scientists continue to claim that these are not controversial issues, evangelicals reminded them that the Church has often stood at the forefront of scientific discovery and innovation, from locking up Galileo to excommunicating Spinoza. Questions remain on whether teachers can advocate for eugenics (one hopes so) and allow students to check their Jewish peers for horns.
Sponsors of the bill plan to next take on American history curriculum that teaches that slavery was evil, that America is not chosen by God to rule the world, that the apocalypse is not just around the corner or that we lost the Vietnam War, didn't find weapons of mass destruction in Iraq or that George Bush was not the greatest president who ever lived. They also hope to institute bills that would forever outlaw sex education, as a precursor to outlawing sex. While liberals claim the bill challenges the separation of church and state, conservatives respond that they are Godless elitist heathens who should read less and pray more. One representative who voted against the bill argued, "They seem intent on making what is already one of the stupidest countries in the world, also one that is stuck in the middle ages." A co-sponsor of the bill replied, "God, wouldn't that be great?"
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